Single and sexless dating
This seems to be the motto of a new bundle of duvet covers from Ikea, guaranteed to give you a better night’s sleep with zero boning.
The two single duvet covers come in a “TOG-ether bundle,” reported, so that two people can sleep in a bed hermetically sealed off from each other with their very own individual duvets, rather than have to negotiate any of the pesky touching or warmth that comes with sleeping under one big duvet.
Ikea will sell the bundle for two days only in the U. S.), a small price to pay to never have sexual intercourse again.
At a glance, the TOG-ether bundle looks like it makes some kind of sense.
Here, it would seem, are two peacefully resting people in a bed with single-serve blankets to meet their exact, individual needs.
I sympathize, but I assure you that the answer to all this is not these two twin duvet covers.
Upon closer examination, these two cozy sleepers in the photo also look like they’re sleeping in two twin beds pushed together and will never so much as brush against each other in the night, hungry for each other’s all-consuming touch.
Nothing says sexy like wrapping yourself in your own individual burrito before hitting the sack.
The two single duvets raise a host of logistical questions, too: If it’s cold out and you want to have sex under the covers, then what?
Don’t say, “You’ll just use the top sheet, of course,” because many people use duvets for the express purpose of getting rid of the top sheet.
That’s a problem in itself — for starters, it’s much easier to wash your sheets than your blankets, so keep the top sheet, please — but the point here is that a top sheet is not enough warmth when you are cold but still would like to have sex.